Stuff

Putting In The Discipline

Nowadays we're so used to having it all, having it now and going with the flow we can forget the old ideas of rigour and disciplines. What is discipline? Top of mind it's the self control to focus on the items that don't come easily or even perhaps, naturally. 

It's generally more relaxing and pleasant to duck those things...but sometimes that's where some nuggets lie waiting. That's the whole sorting the 'men from the boys', 'women from the girls' thing. 

Who is prepared to do the thing that's a bit more uncomfortable? Who is prepared to accept the constraints and do it anyway?

The discipline of mental will is as much a muscle as a 6 pack washboard stomach and should be trained and practised every day.

It doesn't matter how easy an expert makes something look there is always an iron will lurking behind a success story. 

The will to keep going when others flag, the will to ignore the crowd view and to go through with your own ideas, the will to demand higher standards and nurture hidden talent.

These days are tough, every opportunity is hard won, nothing is landing in laps in a lucky way today. So when it comes to getting customers, delivering services, keeping business - it's the discipline that will carry us.

The discipline to run a business both as an art and a craft, to run a business with heart and soul, to run a business as a well oiled machine lovingly cared for.

The language of the trainer is 'trust the process.' Discipline underpins the process. Look at your strength of purpose and your discipline and wonder.

There's no lack of opportunity 'out there', to realise those opportunities we must look 'inside ourselves'.

'Twas ever thus.

 

On Becoming Meaningful

The opposite of becoming meaningful, is becoming meaningless or irrelevant. Possibly one of the most painful things to be. I guess many older people find themselves in this situation. If they don't keep up, don't stay vital and just stick with the ways they know and their well worn habits. Slowly they find themselves sidelined, shuffled over to the slow lane and settled down in the comfy chair to watch the TV. Probably this is why society has become so ageist. Perhaps those managing the old age brand had better tell some of their folk to get with the programme.

But then, you don't have to be old to be irrelevant. Being young doesn't mean you are meaningful. So there are details to consider.

Of course in a spiritual sense simply to be alive is to have meaning, you are, to philosophy scholars, the meaning of life. Just being you.

Working with businesses to discover their uniqueness and then working out how to tell their story takes me into the land of meaningfulness. The point of view must be meaningful, it must create energy and engagement with the audiences, it must stir hearts and minds. 

We are all so sophisticated now and so addicted to the 'new' that cheesy, hackneyed phrases just annoy and tire us. 

If you are trying to get your marketing strategy sorted this year, if you are getting your brand strategy in place, if you are nailing your direction, do not stint on 'meaningfulness'. This part of the process is the fire, the life, it galvanises and motivates way beyond reason.

When you find the sweetspot you will know. It will linger and roll around in your mind. It will flirt with you, light you up and give you spark. It will remind you who you are and why you do what you do. It will enliven you and your business.

Keep the faith, find the meaning et voilà there you are.

Of course if you are thinking, 'what bo******' you should go straight to the post that I haven't written and will never write which is entitled, 'how to stiff 'em for the most money you can'.

For all those willing to do the work to create businesses that have meaning and deliver outstanding goods and services take plenty of time, and fresh air, to clear the path and find the value you bring to your markets. It'll pay dividends, literally.

 

Show Me You Know Me

Walking a mile in another man's shoes is something we don't often do. Sure we watch films, read books, listen to stories of other's lives and empathise. Certainly we donate to Red Nose Day or run a 5k for Breast Cancer. Sometimes we pass by someone else and wonder...

But what if you really were Obama for the day, or Cameron...how about Madonna or the local postman? Would you behave entirely differently or would the life of a popstar or postie become your reality and determine your days?

How much of our world do we shape and how much of us is shaped by our world?

I was at a Social Care meeting yesterday and afterwards, travelling back, one of the delegates told me about their foster son. He is on the autistic spectrum with learning difficulties, was brought up by two people (his parents) who abused him physically from early childhood - meaning now he is primed to be a sex offender. No one picked this up. Neighbours didn't know he was in the house. 

This is not OK - how do we solve these issues? His life has been entirely shaped by the world around him. It was just chance that created his reality. He is not alone, there are others in similar situations.

How do we walk a mile in his shoes and learn to shape societies that don't abuse, undermine and ignore us.

There were other stories of people who don't know how to open a bank account, nor iron, nor clean their homes - they don't have the essential skills to lead a life that can flourish, without mentioning reading and writing.

From my life perspective this seems nonsense, surely they can, but they can't. 

So what's to be done? 

The majority of us now are facing reduced circumstances, even those who are navigating round the outside of the global storm are aware that revolutions are brewing. These are the days when we really must surprise ourselves by our depth and breadth of character. These are the days when we must share what we have, no matter how little or stretched it may already seem. 

There is enough love, bread and song to go around...we can if we want to...

Take the chance today to move away from the comfort of your world for a while and walk in someone else's shoes. Really take a moment to imagine or to engage and then ponder how do we change the world for the better?

No really, how do we do that?

 

When Silence Is Strength and When It is Weakness

The TV is broken. OK so I shouldn't watch TV. I should be far too busy finishing my latest artwork, novel or catching up on back editions of The Spectator. But I do enjoy some programmes so it's a bit of a bore that the speaker has packed up, leaving us watching the screen and listening via iplayers - having to stop one or the other as it goes out of sync with the ads or buffering.

We've got the sub-titles on obv - but you do need background noise, even in the Danish dramas.

Subtitles are a lot of fun in themselves. On Sky Sports they do them and they are so often wrong - they typed up the 'trouser market' rather than the 'transfer market' and Queens Park Whingers! Honestly.

Anyway, the TV repair folks have not come back to me about the speaker and it's been long enough. So do I stay silent and just politely ask for their attention or do I shout at them?

Then there's the time when someone keeps on giving me info too last minute. Do I say something? Then there's the client who has made a mistake - shall I tell them?

Trying to decide when to speak up and when to stay quiet is a real challenge. Too often people just blurt it all out only later to regret they said anything - but then again, if it's boiling up inside you can end up blowing up over something trivial.

My trick is to:

1    Recognise I am annoyed by something

2    Hold my tongue until I am calm

3    Carefully word what I want to say 

4    Speak with truth, not with ego and not with fear and not with frustration

TRUTH is the key. Everyone can hear the truth no matter what the words are actually saying. 

So it's hard to judge. Silence, done well, is truly strengthening and the right words, said at the right time, said in the right way are potent. In fact, texture is great. There's an art to this.

So now, how to tell the repair man the truth?

 

Being On A Roll

I love the English language - it's so accommodating. English words have such richness and life. You can't just put one word or another, you have to really think about the mood each conveys, the meaning they offer. Words, and their neat cousins, the punctuation marks, work brilliantly together to take us along a path to understanding. That's why swearing, when done well, is so fabulous. It cuts through a lot of posturing. When swearing becomes the norm obviously that's just dull and unoriginal. 

Nowadays I write a lot of words, I write reports, three blogs, advertising copy, marketing copy, invitations, notes, emails, texts and tweets; every time I put a string together, they run off and inform, persuade and possibly entertain. They are never perfect, no deadline is ever long enough to allow them that indulgence. My grammar is often shot to pieces. That's comprehensive education for you.

I don't write fiction, even in the advertising copy. I don't always write fact, even in the advertising copy. I mostly write ASPIRE - well that's the sub-text anyway. 

Over the years I have found I love writing. Being on a roll means you are doing the thing you love. If you do it well and find the people who need what you love to do, you can make a living. Gain their trust and goodwill so they recommend you to others, and you earn enough to have a life. Much more than that and generally things start to unravel. Unless you are clever enough to go with the flow and move on upwards. Note Bill Gates' example here. 

I love to write, to create, to understand, to explore, to distill, to share and to encourage. Consistently practicing these means I get better and then, eventually, that I am respected for what I do.

Do your own thing. Practice it, hone it, share it, 'that's just how we roll'.

 

Are We There Yet?

Isn't everything in the future? Isn't everything over there? As I write I am pondering the answer. Every once in a while the world isn't way out over there - just occasionally it's right here, inside you. Every once in a while you sit back and realise you have set the compass, the sails are full and you are headed in the right direction. All the effort to find the exact co-ordinates, to hold the tiller in the right place, to judge the weather, to stand firm and chart the course consistently and determinedly have paid off and you are flying onwards to the destiny you imagined. Of course, the wit in me wants to be naughty and puncture this magnificent scene by some mishap - a sort of Carry On Pioneering pic where someone falls overboard. 

But why spoil this moment? 

Destinies are hard won and there's no guilt required. Anyone who has lived, has already fought another day and another and another and so enjoy the moments you get when happiness is not way out over there, those days when it's right here surrounding you.

Photo courtesy of a dear friend Stefan Lubo 

Projections Without Numbers

Name me three people you admire. Go on write it down. Here are mine. Annette Bening, Diane Keaton and Boris Becker. Name me three people you loathe. Gone on. Here are mine ******, ***** and ************.

Now forget about them and think what it says about you. When we notice qualities in others we admire it's because we share some of the qualities and ideals. There's part of them that we relate to and we like about ourselves. We see aspects of our nature or character and they 'resonate' with us and we enjoy them in others. On the other hand the people we loathe reflect parts of us we have tried to forget, hide, ignore, or just pretend aren't there. These people annoy us and irritate us and remind us of these unloved characteristics we have.

So now you can start to understand more of your own self by looking around you and considering the reactions you have to other people. The projections without numbers. If you admire someone or at least a part of their nature then think about that and how it relates to your nature. If you dislike someone, same story. 

The clever little trick is to look at the aspects that you dislike and own them, understand them and recognise them for what they bring to you. This is harder than it sounds, but each time you do it two things happen, you grow wiser and you vaporise the irritating person too. Not literally obv, but you find them less irritating and frustrating. It's equally important to own the good stuff too. To see yourself in those you are admiring. It's a balancing act - don't get big headed but don't be downbeat either.

 

 

The Four Basics of Marketing

If you are dedicating your time to earning a living in a business then there are four basic things that need to happen in your marketing activity.

1    You need a strategy. A direction. A way forward.

2    You need to stand apart from the crowd. Be significant. Stand for something. Be known.

3    You need to have habits and systems that support your marketing strategy and make the most of your 'stand apart' position. You need contact.

4    You need a real budget so you can measure your returns. Marketing is an investment just like any other. 

Many businesses that perform but don't soar have none of these in place. It takes focus to get these sorted. 

Hint: businesses rarely do these basics on their own without outside help. 

This is week 4 of 2012. No time like the present.

 

Owning Up

There's a dark side to everyone in real life. Good people do bad things. We spend a lot of time trying to hide the dark side. Whether it's something small like we are untidy or something rather more substantial like we are druggies; whether it's we eat too much or like gossip mags, there are so many guilty pleasures that we all have and guilty characteristics that we all conceal.

The odd thing is that when we own these bad traits we discover something else about ourselves that is new and enriching. We discover texture to our nature and to our personality, we discover hidden facets that point to a new more nuanced character. We become more attractive, not less, more accomplished not less.

When we own up to the dark side we find more compassion for others, less irritation from colleagues, friends, neighbours...less struggle to hide and oddly we shine more light on our true selves.

Our relationships meld into more intimacy and our outer skins soften and ripen.

Think of someone you know who has a rigid nature where they are disciplined or definite on what they believe or don't believe and you will find there is a dark side they are concealing. Aspects of their nature they are so afraid to share that, if only they knew, would be more interesting, more tantalising and more exciting than the façade they have put up.

Social media is a watershed time because it means we can own up to who we are, warts and all. I don't mean we have to put up every little bit of minutae, that is dull and boring. I don't mean that we have to tell everything to everyone, that's pointless. I do mean we can mature and share more facets of ourselves and our being than ever before. I do mean we can do business with people we have a more shared understanding of. 

Every moment we spend covering up is a moment we can't shine out. The vast majority of things we are hiding are tiny and inconsequential to those around us. Our mistakes and weaknesses make us who we are just as much as our triumphs and strengths. 

Experiment with owning up to some of your less desirable traits, first to yourself, then to others and finally to a wider world. When you are owning up to them - think about what quality they actually show about yourself - the silver lining, so to speak. 

For example if you are jealous of someone's achievements it's really signalling you have unachieved ambitions of your own and what's wrong with that? You are seeing the other person as having something you want and what's wrong with that? Just own up to being jealous and you can take hold of your own ambitions openly and honestly. 

If you are ashamed you are disorganised then perhaps you are hiding a creative streak that means you spend your time creating new ways of doing things - own your originality along with your untidiness. 

Our natures are a balanced book and the more we own the more we own.

Have a great week out there.

 

 

 

 

Building In Freedom

When you build a future it's easy to forget to build in freedom. Successful people don't always have the freedom you might imagine them to have. Don't you remember Simon Cowell knew his diary for the next year or more...Right now Sam Cam is probably negotiating the summer holidays with Dave who is struggling to find a 'window'. 

I know a man who has squillions and can't retire or do his own thing because he has so many ties. 

We're all creating futures in one way or another, brick by brick, word by word, call by call...freedom is the gift inside.

If you have it all but can't take a breezy day out or kick your heels for a while you are missing out. The world spins with or without you. Children grow whether you are there or not. Life happens moment by moment whether you notice or not.

Sure it's right and proper and downright inevitable to have busy periods and burn the candle at both ends for a while.

But freedom is what we all want in one way or another and so freedom must be built into the plan as an integral part and not just an end game strategy. Your brilliance craves it, and have it she must.

So in your plan for 2012 put in a line which is 'freedom' and make sure you do it and don't keep robbing your freedom bank no matter what the world demands of you. If your idea of freedom is crafting or golfing or walking or reading, if it's playing the guitar or staring at the sunset, if it's noodling in water colours or going out with no agenda and no watch or if it's even looser than that - put it in and honour it. It's an essential element in the plan and building it in at the beginning makes it easier in the longrun.

PS Freedom is not just the default weekend setting where you go along with what the home crowd wants. It's a separate line that satisfies your freedom needs whatever they may be.

 

 

Encouraging Genius

There's a woman selling The Big Issue near where I live. She's taken over from Dean who used to sell The Big Issue and then got a job with Pizzahut. She's from Romania. She's fed up. She stands outside Tesco. We walk past. I wave. We have briefly spoken. I am not sure she's selling many. Dean had a thriving trade in exactly the same spot. He was very outgoing and friendly. He bravely and gently crossed the line from stranger to someone we 'knew'. He got on with the job in hand and enjoyed it - I hope he's doing brilliantly at Pizzahut or was it Dominos?

So how does this woman from Romania move past The Big Issue to her next chapter? How can I do something easily to spark her genius, her inner zest? Nothing too onerous, just in the daily course of things. Is a wave enough? Should I take her for tea, listen to her story, point out the good things, encourage her? If I do that, I have begun a 'friendship' of sorts. Do I want that? Does she?

Is a wave as I walk past conveying my hopes for her success? Do you think she knows that I wish her well? 

If I were her, what would I hope for? I would hope people wouldn't think I was nobody. I would hope people would see beyond The Big Issue jacket.  I would hope they would recognise how talented and brave I was and how far I had come in order to be selling The Big Issue. I would hope they would realise that I could be stealing or selling tricks to earn the money to eat. I would hope they would be compassionate about me and my situation. I would hope they would see me and smile and yes, wave. I am not sure I would want someone prying into my situation or trying to understand me or befriending me. 

I would hope someone would show an interest in me and my journey and then I think that would be enough for the time being. 

Encouraging genius is a tricky business and needs a delicate touch, it's not always the same, everyone is different. Sometimes it's a wave and sometimes it's a call and sometimes it's just a look.

We can all encourage genius, and who knows what might happen then.

 

Just One Thing...

Pick one thing you want to 'bust'. If it's an area of debris in your business or a situation in your personal life, just name it and clean it up.

Often we tolerate situations and irritations until we forget they are there. But they still nag at us quietly in the background. Today at the start of week 2 in 2012 decide what you are going to challenge. Just one thing and go for it. 

Me, it's to clear out the 'dregs'.

When I tidy up or clear out I have a formula.

1    Put all the stuff in one place out where I can see it.

2    Organise it into groups. 

3    Throw away the things I can.

4    Put away the things I can.

5    Give away the things I can.

6    Create new folders or places for the items with no home.

7    Put the remaining 'dregs', things I can't throw, won't throw, into a bag til another day.

The 'dregs' always get stuffed somewhere out of sight. Where they stay. So this tidy up, I have begun to finish the job. I tackled it yesterday and I will tackle it today. I will tackle the dregs bag until it is gone, over, yesterday.

Once I have drained the bag clear of all its random items then I will have peace of mind. The inner knowledge that yes, I can focus on one tiny, irritating thing and vanquish it.

Yes I am a superpower that can bring about world peace. Well at least peace in my own world.

And that's a start...

Take Stock - Be Honest - Make Changes

Everyone starts somewhere in a New Year. Here are a few suggested places you may be right now.

A great place - you have a vision and you are working your way towards it, you have associates and contemporaries that you spark well with, you have momentum, don't feel overwhelmed most of the time and are optimistic about your chances of success. You know clearly what you have achieved and what's on the horizon for you. You have back up plans and the resources to ride out the storms if and when they arrive.

A good place - you have made mistakes in the past but you have learnt from them and accepted the part you played in them. You have thought through what you want and where you need to be. You have developed good networks around you and have a clear idea of where you are going. Even with dwindling or scarce resources you are confident that you can be successful.

A challenging place - you have always been successful in the past, but things were different then. Everything is so much more complicated now and what with the technology and twitter and all the extra demands on your time, it's easy to be overwhelmed. You are hazy on what to do next and the direction you are heading in. There are a lot of areas that frustrate you in your life. You have few friends and confidantes that would understand your situation and you feel hemmed in. You'd really like to just pack it all in and get away from it all, but you can't. So you battle on.

A precarious place - you have tried to make a go of your work or your business but it just doesn't work. You are exhausted and baffled by your situation. You work hard, have always been straight and honest but nowadays people demand something for nothing. You have little or no energy or enthusiasm for your work and have no idea what to do next. Your finances are of significant concern to you and you really are not sure what the future holds.

Whatever you are facing up to in 2012 whether the future looks dazzlingly bright or horrendously dark it holds far more possibilities than you can imagine. That's why it's a good idea to engage a mentor or a coach to support you getting what you want and where you want to be. If you're on the up, then a mentor can help you decide how to handle your success and how to put sustainability into your business so you don't burn out. If you are plateauing then a mentor can help you see where the roadblocks are and why you are finding it difficult to surmount them and if you are falling fast, then a mentor can help you come to terms with your situation, work through it and survive, then begin to flourish again.

Running a successful business is really an extraordinary feat. Balancing so many things correctly, from the books to the staff, to the markets. It is no wonder so many fail and so many people struggle. But if it's in your blood there's not much you can do but get on with it. Running a successful business that employs people and stretches people's talents and creates wonderful work is rewarding and worth fighting for.

So if you're on your way to your 15th million, hooray - write to me with your secrets, if you're on the ropes head down ready to bail out, then you are not alone - face up to where you are, take stock, be honest and make changes. If you want help, call.

Laver's Law

Some people are just brilliant and this James Laver obviously was when he invented his law concerning attitudes to fashion as illustrated below. Thanks to Pauline at Fashion Era - great site for nerds like us.

Laver's Law
Indecent	10 years before its time
Shameless	5 years before its time
Daring	1 year before its time
Smart	----------
Dowdy	1 year after its time
Hideous	10 years after its time
Ridiculous	20 years after its time
Amusing	30 years after its time
Quaint	50 years after its time
Charming	70 years after its time
Romantic	100 years after its time
Beautiful	150 years after its time

 

Invest In What's Working

Sometimes the most obvious ideas elude us when we overcomplicate our lives. Over the holidays I played Monopoly and it's a pretty basic reminder of the rules of capitalism. I only had the reds - others had much more than me. I only had one house on each red. Others had much more real estate than that. I didn't have much hope.

So I spent and bought another house on each. Then I realised that the upside of buying 3 houses on each was huge compared to one or even two on each. So with every bit of cash I had, I bought. We were playing a version where the rent on the reds with three houses was $9000 and that was a lot. Then I got a bit of luck with people landing on me, then I had to pay house repairs which set me back but people kept landing. I invested again and then had hotels and bit by bit my opponents fell. I took their properties in lieu of payments and the dye was set.

This reminded me of an episode of The Apprentice where the teams had to decide what they would sell on a street market. They then had to buy more of the items that were going well. Just keep on investing in the stock that was selling fast.

It was too easy for most of them, they wanted to beat the system, defy the odds and buy things that weren't selling - organising their stall to try to retail stuff that wasn't attractive.

These two examples clearly illustrate that sometimes business life can be simple. Take a look at your 'stall' - what's selling well, invest time and a little money in that and the chances are high that you'll be well rewarded. Just too simple for you, eh?

Happy New Year out there.